14.

You will not believe what happened last night whilst watching 10 news again - picture my family waiting excitedly infront of the televsion for lippy woman to say " the Gong" in her silly weather report again; when she did we errupted into applause - Coco screaming with laughter, mum throwing her back, so far that it would normally cause great agony, you can probably guess what I was doing and FatherGordon was banging on the couch with his fist to the violent extent of bringing the nights dishes at the opposite of the room, clanging down to the floor leaving us all in hysterics.

13.

Oooohayhey - More to say:
For some months me and my sister have had a relentless war over the brand "Lipsmacker", my aunt now owns the brand and often brings us this poisen in high quantities, it's thoughtful but is it really necessary? The smell the detangler leaves in te bathroom after coco (my sister for those who don't know) has had a tantie about her curly hair and eventual sprayed a shitload of this toxic shite through her crazed blonde mop. I have to enter this polluted area to finish my hair and makeup and whatever els I haveto go through in the
morning, with my gas mask and a full silver suit to repell the smell! Anyway, my reason for telling you all his is because today in the supermarket, coco spied the most rediculous thing since the invention of scillicon bras - wait for it - lipsmacker yoghurt.

12.

Good afternoon.
Whilst watching 10 news last night, the brunette with wierd lips was informing us of the upcoming weather, when she said 'And 27* for "the Gong"'; as if this woman could be that bogan to say on the news for Jesus-mans sake! (For those who haven't worked it out, the woman meant Woollongong. (*for more hilarious adventures with the news woman look no further than blog number 14.)

I honestly just saw a mother in a supermarket that closely resembled Robert Plant.

11.

Honestly, my reason Blogging now in it's ghastly entirety is that I am bored to deAth.
I just watched a movie though, it gaveout the vibe that it was a whacky Tim Burton film but I'm not sure because I can't be arsed checking the cover, it was a childrens movie but I got scared shitless in some scenes - I thunk adults and young adults will enjoy it more than the age it wad intended for. The movie was Coraline and I thoughraly enjoyed it, so, do grace you eyes with this film as it is very visually impressive.

10.

Oooh! We are in them damn fine double digits.

Iv just noted how ridiculously similar all the house along this ferral freeway ate. It's much same as the ones along that popular highway (...) and they all have their own tennis courts, swimming pools and home cinemas. This states an obvious thing: these people never converse with each other as they do in the adds, they must be such antisocial people! All the adds are about how great the flipping "community", that group of freaks are all about having bigger and better plasmers than their tightarse nieghbors, And you wouldn't go to your tightarse nieghbors ugly brick home - that could be, in freak language, an admitance to defeat - Nono, that must spend their time in Hardly Normal buying new majestic appliances. It is all intensly depressing.

9.

Hi there. Lil again. Not Larry.
I'm in Sydney - or rather Woollahra Darling, it is simply the Toorak of Sydney and the most hilarious place iv ever been: the well groomed dogs that lick the expensive cottage cheese off the toast at the cafes that only seem to cater for middle aged women with lushes hair, manicured nails and dressed
in their morning Lycra scoffing with their friends about theyr other friends.

I just ate some magnificent icecream.

8.

PLEASE COME AND SUPPORT MY SCHOOL, AND HAVE AN INTENSLY MUSICAL AND TASTEFUL NIGHTS FUN FOR YOURSELF.


Staring:
Rockwiz Orchestra

Dudes from...

Bad Seeds
You Am I
The Drones
Augie March
The Panics
Blue Ruin
Black Eyed Susans
Ukeladies
And Many More!!!!





Food from Spanish resteraunt of the year MoVida, There will be a fully loaded wine bar, and a kickass silent auction!!

All this wonderousness will be in the absoloutly fucking stunning Thornbury Theater on ( i think its high st).

$120 a ticket and it all goes to our beautiful school.


HOney's of the world, this will be a kickass night and it is NOT to be missed!!!!!!!

7.

Hi There, Again. So sorry.

Ok, lets get boilin'.

This is my future husband.


He goes by the title of Tom Sturrige.


Anyway, I highly loath the new Gi Joe movie, In the words of a pro reviewer, 'It is the worst movie i have ever seen in my whole life' And mind you, that pro reviewer wasnt me. But really, save yourself! What i had to go through wasn't that bad, because we had 24 cans of soda to 1/2 drink an then boot down the seats.., But seeing as not many people are that rude, I'm assuming you are not that rude, please for the love of everything unholy- or holy, whichever you choose- do not ever see this movie, Unless you are in the mood for a few 'try this one out for size boys' lines and lots of piss taking afterwoods, then fine go see it.



Listen to the WHORES


http://www.myspace.com/oreswhay

Utter brilliance.





Oh yeah, and mention me and my blog if you befriend them.

6.

Oh, God. Did you hear about Debra, she was out all day drinking Heroin out of a hot water bottle; Fell down on a burning sword and exploded into a million bits and then she attacked by two tiny dwarfs made intirly out of celery and spider sperm, throwing this big tin-foil at her that they'd stolen from a bus full of school children who were smugling chutney accross the mexican border in their heads and they all were chased down a chocolate well, where they drowned a pool of Dentists piss.
DYLAN MORAN

5.

So, Here i am again: to hopefuly brighten the lives of you surfs...

Now, I shall explain myself.

- The reason i haven= not been Blogging is, (in Dot Point format, very classy)

• My life is so increadibly boring, and i have had nothing to write about.





• Even though my life may be boring, I have no time to write due to homework.





• My parents are tight about my intake of electronics.





• I hate to say it, but Myspace is funner.

So there you have it, my pretty sad reasons for not writing...

Ah yes, Overheard.

Accidental Exchange for the lyrics of the terrible song 'This Aint a Scene its a God Damn Arms Race', by the terrible Fall Out Boy. My Friends sister thought it was 'This Aint an Emu its a God Damn Ostrich!'

Now, to put words in Larrys mouth.

'I think that you should recognise that, Lily, Godess of Magic, Is not peeping at you from her bed and saying, 'No, not now, later..' *wearily*! She is NOt! i tell you now that she cares about you so much that she has made an email account to recieve ideas for this Fun-fun blog, and is expecting you to email her with high praise!'

lilyandlarry@live.com.au

4.

So sorry i haven't blogged for so long, Have been quite sick and the bulk of Highschool homework has hit me. I have guests over now, a lady who snorts when she laughs, her hialrious husband and their pleasant kids. For this reason i Cannot write a full blog.

Good Day to You x

3.

Good Mornin'

I simply had to share this book...

The Gospel according to Larry is an Awesome book 'As told to Janet Tashjian' - how weird is this, its is a about a boy who has a blog site called The Gospel according to Larry, this is a genius book and i got it out purely for the cover and the title, itsjust...- read it!

2.

Howdy...My little earthlings, 'Tis I Colourbost the Crab... nah, its actually lily here, which is not a surprise... since larry doesn't exist and the blog's called Lily & Larry... yup theres me rambling on, i assume if you know me in person you will already be aware of that trait, but if you don't, well then, you better get used to it.

Olso, you rock my socks.

This morning me, my sister, my mum, and my cat were playing Monopoly and we were telling my sister to give me 2 dollars, after and incredible 5 minutes of stress and hardship, she finally said 'what? 4 four dollars?'. Oh God. The vagueness of our youth.

Playing with make-up is fun right?Yeah, well at the moment i'm obsessed with it. I asked for some good facepaints for christmas and Santa-man saw into the future, and saw pissed off my parents would get sooner or later, and said 'sure lil!', at first they posed as happy that i got my wish, But when they saw the good ol' vanity bason after after my trail of destruction made its course through the bathroom, they hit the roof, hurting their heads which made them even more furiuos! Can you imagine the beating i got: The splatter of the Blood! The crunching of the Bones!

'hey lil? can you wipe the sink?' 'sure' 'ok honey, love you!' 'love you too ma'

Last night i saw a fantastic movie, Baz Lurhmans Romeo and Juliet. It was just fantastic! i know everyones probably seen it already and i just hopped in the Purple Wiggles car, but really, how great is it?



I think id like to do something on consumerism (thanks Suum) but i really dont have have time now, i'll just edit this later.



Do's and Dont's or the rest of you life:

Do : Record your life in pictures. Imagine looking back on it?

Dont : Support Miley Cyrus. No further comment needed.

'God, I'm sweating like a petophile on a bouncy castle.' - Larry

1.

"Nessa ordered a colourful beverage resembling a tropical rain forest. I half expected David Attenborough to peep over the rim of the glass parting fronds and speaking in hushed tones."



That my well-earned friends is an exerpt from a fantastic book 'Its not all about YOU Calma' by hilarious author Barry Jonsberg. Yes. I know. His name makes him sound like a vicious outback bushy. "Woah- you don' wanna mess with Barry sonny Jim! he'll eat your cock off!"




Well, -shit i just got soup over over my top...-ok i thought id steal this segment from "M" magazine because i think its just fantastic. Sorry Olso.

I was on a "joyous" family boat trip and we had stopped in the lovely NSW town of Avalon in a Red Cross Op Shop and there were to old ladies, one of them purchasing a hideous fringed hand bag that would have stopped Daniel Craig pouting as the the sequined accessory jangled passed him. The old dear clinging the fashion pollution, piped up and said 'well now i have a night bag! it is daring but i like a bit of individuality!(well she was certainly individual! meaning nothing with a pulse go with 10 miles of it...)' anyway, the other screaching hag said 'well, you'l have to start going out at night then.'

These are some pictures i took when my sister and her friend were playing dress-ups.

My latest obsession is the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

On thursday i went to see funny-english-man Steven K Amos who made my stomach hurt so much i'm considering sueing him! Really, his show Find The Funny still on till the 12th of april so get your lovely arses down to the comedy theater!

I am also going to see Dylan Moran of ABC's Black Books. Thats in a week or so and i'm weeing my panties with excitement.

Do's for Dont's for the rest of your life.Movies.

DO : Perve on Paul Bettany in the new film Inkheart. If your into guys that is. I'm not going to make you do anything you don't to (yet). Actually, if your keen on keeping you and your family intact, then don't you dare even think about getting him. he's mine!

DON'T : Go and see Watchmen. It is terrible.

'Larry saw a badger today, it was actualy caesar dressed as badger' - Larry

Oh and i'll just clear this up, there is no such thing as Larry, i made him up. Perhaps i'll get quotes from my friends, They can give Larry a voice!