Friday, April 3, 2009


"Nessa ordered a colourful beverage resembling a tropical rain forest. I half expected David Attenborough to peep over the rim of the glass parting fronds and speaking in hushed tones."

That my well-earned friends is an exerpt from a fantastic book 'Its not all about YOU Calma' by hilarious author Barry Jonsberg. Yes. I know. His name makes him sound like a vicious outback bushy. "Woah- you don' wanna mess with Barry sonny Jim! he'll eat your cock off!"

Well, -shit i just got soup over over my top...-ok i thought id steal this segment from "M" magazine because i think its just fantastic. Sorry Olso.

I was on a "joyous" family boat trip and we had stopped in the lovely NSW town of Avalon in a Red Cross Op Shop and there were to old ladies, one of them purchasing a hideous fringed hand bag that would have stopped Daniel Craig pouting as the the sequined accessory jangled passed him. The old dear clinging the fashion pollution, piped up and said 'well now i have a night bag! it is daring but i like a bit of individuality!(well she was certainly individual! meaning nothing with a pulse go with 10 miles of it...)' anyway, the other screaching hag said 'well, you'l have to start going out at night then.'

These are some pictures i took when my sister and her friend were playing dress-ups.

My latest obsession is the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

On thursday i went to see funny-english-man Steven K Amos who made my stomach hurt so much i'm considering sueing him! Really, his show Find The Funny still on till the 12th of april so get your lovely arses down to the comedy theater!

I am also going to see Dylan Moran of ABC's Black Books. Thats in a week or so and i'm weeing my panties with excitement.

Do's for Dont's for the rest of your life.Movies.

DO : Perve on Paul Bettany in the new film Inkheart. If your into guys that is. I'm not going to make you do anything you don't to (yet). Actually, if your keen on keeping you and your family intact, then don't you dare even think about getting him. he's mine!

DON'T : Go and see Watchmen. It is terrible.

'Larry saw a badger today, it was actualy caesar dressed as badger' - Larry

Oh and i'll just clear this up, there is no such thing as Larry, i made him up. Perhaps i'll get quotes from my friends, They can give Larry a voice!


  1. you know that bit you wrote about peeing in your pants it was sooo funny?
    well you made me do the same thing reading your blog!
    you're a cack girl!
    keep writing!
    pen xxx

  2. you are hilarious!!!
    and dont worry i'm not some freaky stalker, just a friend of miss penpens...